my empty cup

I poured my empty cup into your angry similes
like a deluge of indifferent enmeshment
demanding and pleading that that would fill me up
because your raw reactivity hurt beautifully
     helped me hide the swollen eyes of my own aching ocean swells
     offered refuge from the rabbit that'd made camp inside my starry heart
     gave violent outlet to the fright I'd meticulously covered with tapestries of light

I poured my empty cup into your childish fantasies
dark towers, witching hours, pedophilia, and melymbrosia
pondering and praying for that to fill me up
because your fancy figments bellowed over tragedies
     helped me ignore the worthlessness run rampant in my thoughts
     silenced the dragonfly that'd sprinkled illusions across my dusty mind
     gave welcome reprieve from the painful delusions I'd carefully crafted from innocent ideals

I poured my empty cup into your brown skin, sinewy and strong
repressed and finessed, knowing this fire beneath my dress
craving and clawing that that would fill me up
because you'd be the yin to my yang or the other way round
     helped me escape the tender chasm between my tired legs
     awakened the elk that'd slumbered beneath the dry lips of my clit
     gave primal relief to the hungry she-child I'd shamed into cowering behind curtains of disdain

I poured my empty cup into your courageous consciousness
interconnection, one source, divine spirit open wide
forgetting that intuitively I didn't want it to fill up
because you'd take from me the freedom that I had left in loneliness
     helped me lullaby to sleep the gracious goddess there inside
     showed me the eagle-wing shadows of our cosmos evading my bold witness
     gave dark illumination to the truths in the cracks I'd desperately plastered with naivete

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